Friday, September 26, 2014

Fear

Fear is an interesting thing. It can make you do a lot of different things depending on the situation and who you are as a person. Fear motivates people in ways other people never expect. There's a lot of different things for different people to fear at different times. It's a complex emotion (hey, what isn't?) and as a writer I've explored it. I've studied fear in my characters and of course, I've studied it in myself.

For those of you reading this that follow my Twitter account,you'll notice that for the past two days I haven't been writing. For those of you who have no idea who I am: that's REALLY weird for me. Well, unless I've finished a project or National Novel Writing Month is over. I've not finished a project and NaNo isn't until November.

So, why did I stop writing? Am I suffering from writer's block? I don't believe in writer's block. Am I having problems with my Inner Editor? My Inner Editor is my Muse and we rarely have issues. Am I stuck in my current plot? Not really. So, again, why did I stop writing?

I'm afraid.

That's right. I'm afraid. Of what? Well, a lot of things. I'm afraid of midnight, mirrors after midnight, oh, right, writing. Sorry. I'm afraid of rejection. I'm afraid of not being good enough. I'm scared to SHIT of what I'm planning to do next month so I'm procrastinating this month.

What is it that's making me so afraid?

Well, you see, I've been an official self-published author since March 2010. Yeah, four years. I've not even come close to seeing my return on anything. I actually hate the only novel I have available right now and all my anthologies are unedited.

I'm also working as essentially an unpaid intern and have been for about the same amount of time as I've been self-published. For clarification: I've not had a paycheck in over four years. I've been surviving off lines of credit, credit cards, and inheritance. Not fun, I'll tell you that much.

What does that have to do with my fear of what's going to happen next month? Simple. At the beginning of this year I made it one of my goals to publish something. Next month, I'm going to start the beginning phases of completing that goal.

My plan is to start some kind of funding campaign (kickstarter, gofundme, gofundle, pick one dang it) and raise enough funds to edit, get a cover (if I can't make a decent one) and promote Burnt: The Story of the Fire King which is this month's novel.


If the campaign is successful (I'm planning to run it until December) then I'll have a published novel I'm proud about out into the world by early next year, depending on editing. If I use the 2K or so I hope to keep for promoting then I'll actually be able to get it into reader's hands and possibly make enough to at least pay some of my bills.

So what's the problem? Again, I'm scared shitless. Why? Because I've done the editing shtick before. I've had editors tell me that my stuff is great but seeing all those comments and red lines makes me think I'm not good enough. I see it as a kind of rejection, that I've messed up so bad that I shouldn't even bother. Granted it is grammar, wrong words, and tighter sentence structure that is meant to help (and does) but I still can't seem to get past it. I'm not sure why.

I do know for sure that I don't like to leave a goal unfinished and I've had the publishing goal on my resolutions list for years now. It's about time I give it one more try. Again: that is scaring the crap out of me. I know that as soon as I start the funding campaign and especially if it succeeds: I'm going to have to deliver. I'm going to have to get the book edited and actually CORRECT the changes then move on. I've given myself a deadline of October 10.

That deadline means I'll have the funding campaign started and I'll be promoting it like nuts. I'm hoping I don't deliberately let it fail so I don't have to see someone's professional editing.

Hell, even letting a good Twitter friend read a short story freaked me the Hell out. She tells me I'm good enough. Others have told me in the past that I'm good enough.

I don't think I am. I'm afraid I'm not. I'm afraid of being made fun of and rejected. I'm afraid of negative reviews and people not liking my work, and by extension: me.


But, I intend to overcome that fear. I owe it not just to me but to my characters and to all the people who have believed in me all these years. And quite frankly: I need to do this. If I don't I'll end up living on the street, literally because there is only so long lines of credit and what not can hold out. I'm running out of time and damn it, I like my bed.

Fear can conquer you if you let it. I'm tired of letting it hold me back.

Until next time: comments, rants, rage, questions, and concerns can be directed to the comments.

Friday, September 19, 2014

2014 Novel Series #9: Pieces

So this was book 9 of the year, the first book written for July's Camp NaNo. I finished it in 13 days which is funny because there are 13 books in the series. Anyway, I then took a mental break and wrote a scene for a completely different world. I planned a bit of the 13th novel, wrote Best Friend: The Body Part Fairy and moved on the to the 12th book of the series.

This one wasn't as hard to write as the ones prior. It looked back to the events before Face Snatcher where James was on his own as a profiler and basically helped people. Also, this is the book that (with Dammit_Woman's help) inspired Best Friend: The Body Part Fairy. I was giving everyone body parts so...yeah. ONWARD!

Genre: Thriller/Mystery

Word Count: 67,010

Prompt: Voltaire's Ex Lover's Lover:



Main Characters: James Reeves, Mia Liu, Lucy McGregor, Michael Brown, Sable Abella, Gavriila "Karma" Saytakhmetov and our killer.

Minor Characters of Note: David Jones and his boyfriend Andy Smith (again, I know), Cade Golding, Patterson, and, Voltaire - the singer, animator, musician.

Summation: An old case that James tried to solve comes back to haunt him. It was his first official failure but not because of something he did. Now he has a chance to catch the killer who is systematically sending all the survivors of James' prior cases the body parts of the killer's new victim.

High Points: Voltaire.

Low Points: Michael, kind of.

The World: Ours. I'm going to be so glad when I don't have to type that...

Memorable Lines:

(James is 22 here:)
"It'll be fine, kid." Rogers (a much older detective) said.
James scowled. That was the other thing he hated about being a decade younger than the youngest detective. They all called him kid, son, sport, or boy because of the age gap. James had always hated those kind of nicknames.
"I am not a child, nor am I the offspring of a goat." James told him.

What if I were to cut you up and mail each part to a different town? It would take the most brilliant private eye the rest of his life just to put you together. Are you ready to play again Mr, pardon, Detective Reeves?

"Okay. So, what exactly is going on?" McGregor asked.
"Um, there's a severed finger in the box." Izzy said.
Sable dropped the folder she had been holding. Mia cursed under her breath and began moving the boxes and files off the table. McGregor raised her eyebrows and strode towards James. He offered her the box and true to whom she was; McGregor pulled a pair of bagged latex gloves out of her back pocket before taking the box.
"Huh. Do I dare ask where the rest is?" McGregor questioned.
"You can ask but you won't like the answer. The rest won't be coming for a while." James said.
They all looked at him like he'd lost his mind. The funny thing was that he was sure he had just found it.
"What?" McGregor asked.
"I've worked this case before. It won't end like it did the last time." James said.
"Okay. I'm going to go get my kit. Then we can get updated on the old case." McGregor said.
"Two old cases." James said as she started walking away.
"What?" McGregor questioned.
"Oh, James saved me from a serial rapist eight years ago." Izzy said.
"Of course he did. He's James." McGregor said.

"I wondered why I recognized the note." McGregor said.
"Bet you thought you were going crazy, huh?" Mia asked.
"Not really. I recognized the song lyrics." McGregor said.
"Song lyrics?" Michael asked before James could.
McGregor looked at the speakers then at James. It had been a song. No one had figured that out. They had simply thought it was a way for the unsub (The Puzzler) to taunt them.
"You guys had no idea it was a song?" McGregor questioned.
"No." James answered.
She snorted then started half-singing, half talking:
"What if I were to cut you up and mail each part to a different town? It would take the most brilliant private eye the rest of his life just to put you together, a piece in each mail box all over the planet, from Moscow to Tokyo to Guadalajara. I wait for the day when I finally defile, the bodies of my ex-lover's lovers. I'll pile high to the sky, the bodies of my ex-lover's lovers. I wait for the day when I finally destroy, the bodies of my ex-lover's lovers. It's a song called "Ex-Lover's Lovers" by Aurelio Voltaire." McGregor said.
...
"You okay over there?" Mia asked.
"I'm fine and not lying about it this time." James said.
"Oh, good. I guess you just needed to be given a severed finger in a box." McGregor said.

"He moved to live in Woodborough, followed the cases we worked on, and is now physically watching each survivor just to taunt me. I would be flattered if this wasn't so morbid." James said.

"Who gets the job of sewing that (the fingers to the palm) back together?" Mia asked.
"Sable." McGregor said.
"Huh?" Sable gasped.
"Hey, you're my assistant so you get the jobs I don't want to do. Plus it'll be fun putting the hand back together. Oh and you need practice with sewing body parts back to the main body. You're great at closing wounds but this is entirely different."

"Well, you found him. Hello Detective. Whatever it was: I didn't do it." (Hehehe)

The surviving victim of the Face Snatcher (blind among other things) :
"I never got to see what any of my rescuers looked like. That hurts."

"Now I know why dorogaya fits in so well with all of you. You are all weird." Gavriila said.
"It's an exclusive club." McGregor said.

"Well it's an excuse to bring you all over to the dark side with me and give you Gothic make-overs. This is going to be fun."

"Nah I'm good. Besides, it'd be weird to jump to protect James, you know?" Mia replied.
"Why would it be weird?" James asked.
"Cuz you're a guy and generally guys protect women." Mia said.
"Oh. Sorry?" James tried.

"I love you." (Brown)
"You do?" Gavriila asked.
"Yeah. You're my 42." Brown told her.
"And you did not even have to use a masterball." (Ha)

"You can say it, Ki-, detective. I know I made a mistake. I should've listened to you." Rogers said.
Eight years. It had taken eight years for James to hear Rogers admit that. It was not as satisfying as James had thought it might be. James was glad for that at least.
"But hey, I didn't think a 22 year old that looked so damned young could be right on something as simple as whether or not to go to the media. I should've known better with your track record and education." Rogers said.
This was getting out of hand...

"I know you made them for yesterday (McGregor made James cookies for slapping him), but, oh never mind. You know I'm giving most of these to Michael, right?" James asked.
McGregor snorted.
"I know. You've got to keep your girlish figure and all."

"It wasn't. Yeah I got all my homework done before 8PM and could spend my nights reading ahead in textbooks or just reading. But everyone who befriended my used me for homework help or passed off projects on me. No one wanted to be the one to pick me for a partner unless it was for a project that had a huge grade percentage attached then they'd trip over themselves and make me do all the work. Then there are the accusations of plagiarism, cheating, and the glares you get when you correct a teacher? Not worth it." (McGregor on being the smart kid)
...
"Would you give up being smart in order to be normal?" Sable asked.
"Never. Normal's over-rated." McGregor said.

"Though I'm not sure why I'm not improving." James said (about shooting)
"It's totally your eyes. Have you noticed that very few cops wear corrective lenses? There's a reason for that." McGregor said.
"I figured as much." James said.
"You could get laser eye surgery." McGregor told him.
"Well," James started.
"Then again there was this scene in "Final Destination Five" where the laser freaks the hell out and ends up making the hot chick's eye melt. When she finally gets off the table she trips on the button eye that popped out of the teddy bear she was squeezing and fell out the window. Then her other eye popped out. It was awesome though I'd never trust one of those machines." McGregor said.
...
"I don't like the thought of lasers penetrating my eyes." James said.
"Good reason. Why don't you wear contacts?" McGregor asked.
"Let me modify my last statement: I don't like the thought of anything going near my eyes including my own finger." James said.
"It figures you'd have ommetaphopia." McGregor said.
(It's the fear of looking people in the eye - he can still do that- or have anything going near your eye. Fun word for the day. :D )

"And I'd like to eat nothing but chocolate all the time and never gain an ounce. We don't always get what we like."

"Serial rapists are always fun."
Sable was sure McGregor's perception of fun was screwed up. Then again this was the woman watched horror movies and shows to point out what was wrong with them. It made sense that McGregor's perception of fun was off.

"Don't worry about it Michael. We can never win them all."

"You should watch "The Walking Dead." McGregor told him.
"Why?" James questioned.
"Zombies. Is there any other reason needed?" McGregor asked.

"He went to the library where my mother worked every other day for the entire time he's lived here." James said. (He is the unsub, the entire time is five years. Creepy, no?)

"I know, I know, I can't keep looking towards the past because I'll miss the future." James said.
"Oh look, I've trained you to lecture yourself." Mom said.

Friday, September 12, 2014

2014 Novel Series #8: Bloody X-Mas

So yeah, this novel totally shares the same name with a novella I wrote about a Christmas Horror Story. Yes, a horror story involving Christmas. It's free so check out the store. It's also beta-read only cuz I don't have the funds to get anything professionally edited. That in itself is a long story.

Anyway, this was novel 8 of the year, book 10 of the series which still has no name. It was completed sometime in June. June also marked the over 600,000 words in the year point. Oh, and I should mention that these novels weren't the only thing I counted towards MilWordy. There were a bunch of short stories and a few novellas as well. ONWARDS with the summary.

Genre: Mystery/thriller

Word Count: 81,842

Prompt: Er, bloody snowmen. Don't ask. My brain is really weird.

Main Characters: James Reeves, Mia Liu, Lucy McGregor, Sable Abella, Michael Brown, and the killer.

Minor Characters of Note: Karma (Gavriila Saytakhmetov), Michael's online girlfriend. And if I'd know she'd become his online girlfriend I would've given her an easier Russian name. Let's say them together shall we? James, Mia, Lucy, Sable, Michael, Gavriila...ha. Anyway: David Jones, his boyfriend, and Cade Golding. They're ALL back.

Summation: People are being strangled to death then buried in snowmen with just their heads sticking out. Eventually they get stabbed to death so the snowmen become bloody.

High Points: Michael and Gavriila becoming a thing, well, more than a thing. Yeah. All their conversations.

Low Points: The last few chapters because, well, I can't say or I'd completely ruin the ending.

The World: Ours

Memorable Lines:
"Faku it's cold." Mia muttered.
"Well, winter does that." James said.
"Yeah well, winter can fuck off." Mia returned.

"Well, let's head out. I was finally nice and warm too." McGregor said.
"I haven't even gotten warm yet." Mia told her.
"Sucks to be you." McGregor retorted." McGregor retorted.
"Yeah, yeah." Mia said.
"It's supposed to be "I know, I know". You know, like the song?" McGregor said.
James had no idea what McGregor was talking about but smirked at the look Mia gave her. Sable was pursing her lips to keep from giggling. Mia shrugged into her coat without breaking the glare she was giving McGregor.
"Yeah, sorry, I'm not a living Prozzak song." Mia said.
"Such a perfect opportunity and now it's completely wasted." McGregor said.
It was good that they could joke. it was one of the few things that would keep them sane doing what they did.

"Good news: she was strangled before being buried in the snow. Bad news: she's been here for 12 hours. This happened sometime around 9PM last night." McGregor said.

"I have a feeling this is going to be exceptionally difficult." James said.
"Oh yeah?" Mia asked.
"Yes." James answered.
That wasn't good. James was usually right on with his instincts. It was what got them on the Witch Hunter Case and what helped them with basically everything else. If James said this was going to be hard then it was going to be hard.
"How hard are we talking here?" Mia questioned.
"Probably one of the harder ones we've dealt with." James told her.
Yeah, that wasn't good.

So a bit of set-up: They found the first body at 9AM. It's now around 10PM on the same day:
James' phone rang and they all looked at it. He picked it up with a frown. Brown never called and the receptionist downstairs didn't know the particular name they would be looking for. Sable knew this call was not going to be good news.
"Pardon?" James asked.
His eyes were wide and he had become stiff in his chair. James scowled, thanked the person on the other end and hung up. He stood and Sable knew there was no way she was going to get her assignment done when James spoke:
"We have another body."

A better summary of the pace this is going to be set at:
"Second (victim) in 12 hours, well 13 now and we haven't even talked to the first victim's family yet. Brown just got the information on the first victim an hour ago because we just identified her two hours ago, give or take." James said.

"Anyway, thanks for sticking around and have a good night." James said.
"It's all up from here. Good luck." Davis (an officer) said.
James couldn't help but grin at that. Davis was right though. His and Moore's night couldn't get any worse.

Drag0n:D'aww course I'll ask kitten.
Brown waited for the impending nickname of doom.
Karma: Good. I'll leave you to it.
She left. Brown blinked at the screen and paused the videos. She hadn't called him out for calling her kitten. She hated being called kitten. At least, he thought she hated being called kitten. Maybe because they were kind of a thing she liked it. Brown shook that out of his head and went back to the videos.
...(Doesn't last long...poor guy)
Drag0n: I called you kitten.
Karma: ???
Brown rolled his eyes. She wasn't going to make this easy and he'd never had a girlfriend (he's 27). That was kind of sad. (ha) He tried not to think of that as he typed.
Drag0n: Before you left. I called you kitten and you didn't say anything. Why?
Karma: So?
Drag0n: I thought you hated that...
Karma: I got used to it...and we're kind of a thing or something so it's better than any other nickname you could give me.
It didn't make sense to him. If she hated it while they weren't together she should hate it more now that they were. Getting used to it made sense but despite Brown being called Mike or Mikey his whole life he still hated it.
Drag0n: Okay.
He wasn't going to argue. Obviously she thought differently than him and he wasn't going to try to find the logic in her thinking. It might make his head explode and he really should be watching the video footage.
Karma: Get back to work, dorogaya. ;)
Brown watched as she left again and wondered what in the Hell she'd just called him. He didn't know any Russians besides her and had to resort to Google Translate. Brown grinned when he saw it meant "dear" or "sweetheart." It didn't sound like it would be a sweet thing but he supposed that was Russian.

It was too fucking cold to be standing in the snow. It was also too fucking early to be out in the cold. At 7AM a call had come in about another person buried in a snowman at the park. (That's 3 in 22 hours.)

"Yeah, spree killer with no pre meditation or warning kills. It's like this guy woke up one morning and decided he was going to strangle people to death and bury them in snow. That doesn't happen. There's a graduation, a pattern to follow. They don't just wake up and say "I think I'll kill someone today instead of making eggs for breakfast. It doesn't happen like that." (This shouldn't have been so funny...)

"I think my brain may have liquefied and come out my nose or ears."

"You're awesome. When we have more than 12 hours between bodies I'll bake you some cookies." McGregor said.
"Yes. Cookies. Dragon-God likes cookies. They make his tummy smiley." Michael said. (This is what happens when you get 3 bodies in less than 24 hours apparently...)

"James is calling the family now while Michael looks for footage and an id on victim three. He's also seeing if there's a link between the two. I feel like we're being over-shadowed." McGregor said.
"We're doing all we can and he's doing all he can. It just happens we deal in blood and guts while he deals with ones and zeros." Sable said.
McGregor stared at her until Sable looked up with wide eyes and a flush.
"That was the most profound thing I've heard come out of your mouth after being awake for this long. Congrats." McGregor said.

Karma: Everyone needs mental help and if you don't then you're weird. (This is why she became a recurring character.)
...
Brown couldn't help but grin at the pet name. It was such a stupid thing to get giddy over but every time her message box came up he smiled and got a weird feeling in his chest and tummy. Brown wondered if he should get that checked out.

He didn't want to see her failing, not now, but James had a feeling his wants weren't important.

"It's fine. One of us needs to be somewhat awake. James was asleep when you got here anyway." McGregor said.
"Yeah but he was injured." Sable said.
"He seems to be doing that a lot lately. We need to wrap him in bubble wrap." McGregor said.

"But you almost saved (victim four's) life." Sable said.
"Good point but there's a big difference between almost and did." McGregor told her.

"Your girlfriend wants you." Mia said.
"That's a good, wait, she's not my, well, we're, it's weird. Shut up." Michael said.
What was weird was that he barely left his office, was hardly socialized, and had a girlfriend. Well, a female that was more than a friend but less than a girlfriend. It was too odd to think about with no sleep.
"You're more than friends but not dating. Got it. Too bad she's the ocean away. You can't even be friends with benefits."

"Yeah that. Hey look, we have the start of a profile. Did you see the sketch artist yet?" McGregor asked.
"I was about to grab one." Mia said.
"Good, just don't be too touchy. They don't like it." McGregor said.
Mia blinked at that and looked to James. His eyebrows had risen a bit. Yeah, he was shocked that McGregor, not Lucy had made a joke. Michael was right to use some combination name. The two were combining.

"I'm too tired to think completely straight." McGregor said.
"You're not straight anyway." Brown mentioned.
(Yes, he came DOWN from his office to eat with them.)

"Look at me." James said.
"Huh?" McGregor asked.
"He wrote "Look at me" in the victim's blood." James told her.

(Guy taking a video with a phone as Mia and McGregor are putting a body in the CSI van):
"You think this is entertaining?" McGregor asked.
The guy's eyes went wide and the people around him backed off. He shook his head in the negative but kept staring at McGregor. That took balls. He didn't stop the phone from recording and didn't lower the camera.
"How would you like it if it was your mother, sister, or girlfriend in that alleyway, dead and someone was recording what was going on to get views on YouTube?" McGregor questioned.
At this the man paled and shut off the phone. He slinked back into the crowd and McGregor began moving the stretcher again. (By the way, victim 7 in four days.)

The fucking Targaryens talked about waking the dragon. They knew nothing. The bastard had woken the Dragon, God of All Hackers, Seer of All, and Burner of anyone who got in his way. This asshat was not going to get to a victim nine.

"Is it weird that you're making the person whose job is to cut up people, cut up the turkey?"

(James relays an entire conversation every one thought he missed):
"All right Mr. Smartass." Mom said.
"I don't know how you do it Boss." Michael said.
"It's a talent. He used to read fiction during all his classes but still got all the homework done perfectly before anyone else and had the highest marks in every class." Mom said.
"That's Dr. Smartass by the way. I have a degree, remember?" James questioned.
Mom rolled her eyes but Michael laughed. Mia and Lucy smirked.
"Well Dr. Smartass, you keep your butt planted in the chair while me and my little helpers deal with dessert and clean up." Mom said.
Mia stood at that but Lucy remained seated with a smirk. Mom gave her a look.
"You said little. I'm as tall as Dr. Smartass." Lucy said.
"You can cut the pie." Mom said.
"Yay, more cutting things." Lucy said.
She paused in getting up, considering.
"I really shouldn't be excited to cut things, should I?" Lucy asked.
"Hey, as long as you know it's weird." Mia offered.

"They need to see. They need to wake up. They need to see my snowmen. They love my snowmen."

"No. I had a feeling this was going to get worse before it got better. I'm not sure when it's going to get better."

"You cut up dead people, right?"
"That's the simple way to put it but yep." McGregor said.
"Why?"
"It was either that or become a surgeon. At least if they're dead I can't kill them worse." McGregor said.

"So, top or bottom bunk?"
"Bottom this way if I roll out of bed I won't have far to fall." McGregor said.
"Why would you roll out of bed?"
"I'm used to a King size, not a double. Less space lends to thinking you have more space and boom." McGregor explained.
They burst out laughing. Sable was right, McGregor had become more personable. That meant she and Lucy were blending more than anyone thought. It used to be a scary thought but now McGregor welcomed it. Maybe she could become whole.

Friday, September 5, 2014

2014 Novel Series #7: Child

You know why I had to take a break from writing this series? IT WAS FREAKING EMOTIONAL. Seriously, every book dealt with some new horrible thing my characters had to work through and this one wasn't any different. And you know how I took a break? I put them all into a post zombie apocalyptic world and killed them all. Yeah, that's how I take mental breaks.

Anyway, this was novel 7 of the year completed on May 24th. This is also novel 9 in the series which at the time of this writing I still don't have a name for. May also marked six months I'd been working on this monster. ONWARD!

Genre: Mystery/Thriller fiction

Word Count: 65,777

Prompt: This one's actually such a bit spoiler that I can't mention it. Sorry. ;)

Main Characters: James Reeves, Mia Liu, Lucy McGregor, Michael Brown, Sable Abella, and the killer

Minor Characters of Note: Patterson Chief of police who still doesn't have a first name, James' mom.

Summation: Kids are ending up with teeth pulled out stuffed in trash cans with angel wings carved onto their backs. Each kid is a bit older and each one looks like they could be related to the ones prior

High Points: I, huh. WAIT! James calling Sable by her first name, meaning they're friends now and her calling him by his first name. I knew there was something good in this thing. Oh and Michael and Karma become more than friends. ;)

Low Points: Everything else.

The World: Ours

Memorable Lines:

"Okay. I'll complete the cycle." - The Killer

"Are you okay?" James questioned.
"Ask me that one more time and I'm sticking this pen up your ass." Mia told him.
"Um, okay. If you need any, um, feminine things," James started.
"I'm fine. Drop it." Mia broke in.
Boy Scout Detective of the Year was an understatement when he was willing to get one of his female partners' pads or tampons. More men should grow up with a single mother if they turned out like him.
"Dropping it." James said.

"I think we're dealing with two unsubs or an unsub that has multiple personalities."

"Stupid question time: you okay, Boss?" Michael ventured.

"Your mom really needs to learn time management skills or something." James said (about Mia to her cat).
Marty meowed in agreement. At least James liked to think the cat was agreeing with him. For all James knew Marty could be tossing insults at him in cat. (Ha)

"Can we not talk about boobs?" Brown questioned.
"I thought you like boobs. And hey, I like boobs so why not?" McGregor asked.

"He's spending more time looking for a victim that resembles him almost completely. It takes three days for him to be done with the victim and then he disappears. How can we catch a man with nothing?"

Death was a fact. Everything that at one point had taken breath would die when the body could no longer support it. Sometimes death wasn't the fault of the body and was the fault of outside sources. McGregor knew it was her job to determine what outside source had caused the death of 12 year old Simon Haley.
Simon Haley had died en route to hospital after being found by a young woman who had stepped off to one side so she could answer a text. That was when the woman had seen the blood, screamed, and alerted the five or so people around her to a problem. Every one of those people would have nightmares for the rest of their lives.
McGregor tried not to think about how one murder could affect so many lives in an instant. Haley's parents and younger brother were destroyed. The half dozen or so people that had seen Simon in the trash might never be able to look at a trash can or walk down that street again. The paramedics would go to sleep tonight and every night with the knowledge that they had not saved a 12 year old boy.
It was up to her to finalize the death, to figure out why he had died, and to witness how horribly he had suffered. McGregor let out a final breath, snapped her protective gear into place and approached the body of Simon Haley.

"You don't have to work so hard to impress any of us you know." Reeves said.
Sable couldn't think of what to say. He knew. It figured he would know. He had gone to school to learn how to dissect a person's brain while they were still breathing. All her knowledge of dissecting a dead person meant nothing to that kind of education.
"I, well," Sable tried.
"Lucy's all ready got you on a first name bases. That's impressive enough since it took her a year to start calling me by my first name. We bonded after she got hit by a car." Reeves said. Sable tried not to laugh but couldn't help it. Trust Lucy to bond with someone after one of them got hit by a car.
"That was during the Chopper case, right after we managed to chase down (unsub) and just before we brought him in while he tried to get a seventh victim. It took her longer to call Mia by her first name and longer still for Michael. You don't have to impress us. We all know what you're capable of and it's good things, really." Reeves said.
Sable could only nod. He gave her another grin and suddenly he was James. Sable wanted to tell him but kept her mouth shut. She was still Abella to him.
"We should head back to the station, Sable." James said.

Karma: I need your help with something.
Brown had figured that. Normally he wouldn't mind but this was potentially FBI stuff. Karma had been recruited by the FBI because he had said she was ready. If she needed his help this early in her recruitment than Brown hadn't been thinking straight.
Drag0n: FBI?
Karma: No.
That was good.
Karma: I think someone's hacking into my system.
That was bad.
...
Karma:: You're fast.
Drag0n: It's probably why I'm single.
...
Karma: Outside graphics suck, the smells are sometimes shitty, but there are a lot of interesting things out there. (I totally agree with her.)

"It's difficult, not education wise. I can handle that. It's the mental and emotional part. I had to sit there and listen to parents talking about how their dead little boy went missing last month. I can't stop thinking about how tough it was for them to tell their younger son that the older one wasn't going to come home ever again.
"Before that I had to listen to what the unsub went through as a child, how his parents abused him and how he suffered from Dissociative Identity Disorder because of the abuse. The whole reason the unsub's doing what he's doing is because of his father beating him up as a kid. I don't know if I can keep hearing about all this stuff."

"Yes, yes I know. I like that you know how I feel every time you go out running late at night." (James') Mom said.
"I'm running. If anyone could catch up to me while I was running it would be a feat." James said.
"Oh please, you can't outrun bullets," Mom started.
"And I can't outrun a car. I know. But you're," James broke in.
"Older, less fit, and an easy target. You tell me that enough and I might start believing it" Mom finished. (They've obviously had this conversation before...haha)
...
"What don't you know?" Mom asked.
James frowned. There was a lot he didn't know. Where (unsub) was hiding was at the top of that list.
"Too much. Good night." James said.
"Don't think too hard. No one can know everything. Good night."

"You're working with James Reeves and Mia Liu to find the Tooth Fairy, right Ms. McGregor?" a reporter asked.
McGregor looked at the woman and the young, blonde, too pretty, reporter gaped before taking half a step back.
"That's Detective or Forensic Specialist McGregor. That's also Detective or Doctor James Reeves and Detective Mia Liu. Back off. I've got a dead body in a trash can to saw free." McGregor said. (This is why she has a shirt that says she doesn't play well with others ;) )

"It's going to be okay."
"I'm not so sure about that."

"Why did (unsub) take the teeth?" McGregor asked.
"(unsub) didn't take the teeth. He took the teeth." (unsub) said.
"Who's he?" McGregor questioned.
"The other one. The bad one. He suggested giving away the pain but it worked."
...
"So, why did he take the teeth?" McGregor asked.
"He wanted to keep them." (unsub) said.
"Why?" McGregor questioned.
"I don't know. He buried them in places around the city. A different place for every tooth in a place that could be dug up with his hands. They're in flower pots, parks, school grounds, everywhere in the city. No one will ever find them all." (unsub) said.
That was a little over 100 teeth buried throughout the city. McGregor felt a chill race down her spine but refrained from acting on it. The look in (unsub)'s eye had changed. Unsub had become him. He was grinning now. It was a grin that made McGregor wish she had more than just Raven to cuddle up with tonight. She caught Sable shiver out of the corner of her eye. This was going to give them both nightmares.
"Why?" McGregor asked.
"Because it was fun." The voice said.
...
"So you're the one who hurt those kids, killed two and hurt my partner?" McGregor asked.
"Yes. But I won't be in court. The new one, maybe (personality one) or (personality two) will but I won't come out." The voice said.

"I'm alive. That counts for something, right?"
"Yeah but there's a difference between being alive and living."
"Yes, well, how do you live after something like this?"
"You keep putting one foot in front of the other and remembering that despite everything you're still capable of doing a lot of good. We're all here for you."

"I know. We all did. I wish I was good at profound shit so I could help you better but I'm not." Brown said.
"It's enough that you're here, really."